A Shattering Heart
by LeoIchibanTurtle03
Summary: He's been acting strangely this past few days. We don't know the reasons behind his stupid depression, but I have a hint; it was something about Karai.
1. Chapter 1

**A/N: Hey, guys! How are you doing? Here is a new story of mine... :) Actually, I am only planning this story as a one-shot, but if you'll let me continue, then please tell me, by reviewing! **

_**Disclaimer: **_**The turtles are not mine, alright. Just the idea of this fic. They belong to their respective owners. (Just sayin'!)**

_**I. **_

**Raph's Point of View **

It's almost a week since his behavior changed abnormally. He does not eat with us. He just locks himself in his room and never lets other enter; including Splinter. When I pass to the door of his room, I could hear him, sobbing.

He's not training with us in the dojo. He's been avoiding us and ignoring Sensei's advices. When I try to hold him or follow him, he shakes my hand off and glares at me like he's going to kill me.

I don't know what's going on with him. I couldn't figure out what made him act like that.

Even touching or seeing hks very own katana, he's avoiding it. His swords are now collecting dusts and their sharpness aren't tested since he left those at the rack. When sensei forces him to come out or even drag him outside, he just stares on his feet, like waiting for it to melt. When sensei holds his face up, he either flinches or he bursts into tears and collapses.

We'd left the city in chaos. News of the Kraang destroying the city drum my ears. Everything is ruined. We cannot go topside without him to lead us. We cannot literally live without him.

Silence inside the lair is definitely one of the effects. Mikey's playful smile is gone. I know what he feels; he is sad, too and cannot bear the situation. Even Donnie stopped tinkering inside his lab. Most of the time, he is just curled up on the couch. I don't even know if he is sleeping or not.

Me, I am always knocking at Leo's door and _begging _him for me to enter his room. Every hour, I check him if he's still...alive. But everytime I knock, I get no response from him. He was not eating nor drinking for almost two days. The last time I saw him, he looked like _beaten. _His eyes were lined with black and he was very pale. That was three days ago.

I'm sick of this thing! Whatever is _that _which made Leo depressed, I'm going to send it outside the planet. But how will I do that if I couldn't even talk with him? I don't even know the heck reason!

Today is exactly the fourth day of Leo's strange behavior. Still, there is no progress. He's been crying the whole night that I couldn't even sleep. I collected another batch of courage to knock on his door and call his name for the hundredth time.

I carefully placed my first step, avoding any unnecessary noise so that he won't sense me coming. I gathered air and exhaled it deeply. I raised my hand and slowly knocked at the door.

"Leo? Hey are you still there?" For a few seconds, I heard nothing. You can drop a pin and even make me deaf by that sound. "Please. Everything is not fine out here" I remembered a movie doing this same thing. "You're the one who are saying, 'be strong!'. That everything is going to be fine! How can I do that if you...you're the one who isn't fine! I'm just here to listen! Whatever is that thing, we can fix it... Together... Please..." I couldn't stop myself from crying. I slammed the door with my fist and placed my head on the steel surface of the door.

He's very...selfish! Why couldn't he just go out and fix things! Was it that bad for him not to share it with us, his _own _family?! He's just making things worse!

"I'm sorry..." A very faint voice, barely heard by someone who has never had a training, made my eyes narrowing. It's _Leo. _For the long time hat seemed forever, this was the first time I heard his voice, even if it was _very faint. _"Why? What's wrong? Tell me..." I could _feel _him, flinching. "I-I can't...I just...can't.." _Why? _I heard his trembling voice. It made my heart melt. He's been hurt, badly.

"Come on, Leo. Let us fix it. Just go outside and let us talk about it." "No." His reply was as hard as a rock. Completely unbreakable. Based on the tone of his answer, I can't fprce him to do something. Maybe it will only make the situatiom worse.

I too, a step back, like what I did yesterday and punched the wall with my clenched fist. My heart is burning, like it's going to explode. I could feel my fists trembling and sweat trickling down from my skin. I wanna get a tractor and destroy Leo's door, now.

To lessen this outburst, I walked into the dojo witj creased brows and a deep frown.

Still, he has not changed. He's still depressed on something stupid that I don't know. He's such a...coward!

As I entered the dojo, all eyes were on me. They stared at me like I have grown an extra head. I raised a non-existent brow and gestured, 'Why?'

Master Splinter was the first to stand up. "Come, Raphael" Slowly, I went towards them and sat beside Donnie.

It is quite, different without Leo at my right. I...honestly miss him from head to toe. I miss his stupid plans. I miss him sparring with me. I miss our...fights. My best friend Leo, our leader, our big brother. I really miss him, even though it was only four days since the last time I saw him.

"I heard...we all heard you talk with Leonardo lately. What happened, my son?" _Sensei. _His eyes turned hazy and his voice changed a bit, with an obvious hint of anxiety. Every night, when I try to sneak a peek to Leo's door, I could see him, standing beside it. Calling Leo with his softest and most calm voice; even though he was not receiving any reply.

I shook my head and stared at the floor. Seconds later, I saw drops of liquid falling to the ground. Am I crying? I wiped my eyes but the tears still don't subside. I bit my lips. A rough hand fell upon my head and tapped it, gently.

I raised my head and stared against his hazel eyes. "What should we do?" I asked. I closed my eyes and started to sob, as the huge amount of tears flow down to my cheeks. Maybe I am also starting to break down.

I felt warm arms wrapping around me, enveloping my whole body with a warm embrace. Sensei, Donnie and Mikey. We all feel the same for Leo. We couldn't bear his _loss. _An emotional type of loss.

After a comfortable minute, we all released each other from the hug and simultaneously wiped our eyes. This must be stopped. This must be _revealed. _If we cannot talk with him, we'll find a way to know what is the _reason _before finding the right solution.

-'":;!?,.

**A/N: Okay dudes, yeah.. I know it's **_**very short **_**so what do you think of it? Worth continuing? **

**Don't forget to review, fave. or follow! I'll be expecting some words of encouragement from you! **


	2. Chapter 2

**A/N: Sorry for not updating too soon. I just lost my will power in writing things. One of my teachers made me realize the painful truth. :'( I'm not here to seek for your sympathy, but I'm here to explain myself, just in case you are thinking the same thing. I don't think I am a good writer. I don't even think that I deserve to be here in this **_**writing **_**community. Grammar is a great problem with me. But hey, I don't want to disappoint you guys. I need to continue what I've started. (lol.. I placed too much feels with those statements)**

**Read & Review! **

_**Chapter 2**_

_Leo_

The blue banded turtle cracked his eyes open. He rolled his eyes around and scanned the place. Several buildings, rooftops, the moon and the dark, night sky; those were all he could see. He didn't know where exactly he was, nor didn't know what he was doing here. He found himself lying down on the floor under the skyline.

He tried to move a muscle. Burning pain scorched inside him, like he was melting. Every piece of him hurts. He winced feebly, like his voice was all gone.

"Giving up already?" Someone said to him. The voice wasn't clear and he couldn't even recognize if it was from a male or from a female. His vision became obscured as a white haze slowly covers it. He wanted to ask, _who are you? _But his own body deterred him from doing anything.

_Who am I anyway? _The poor turtle searched his mind for anything, but it seemed like his brain was blank. He didn't know who he was. He didn't know _what _he was.

His heart pounded loudly. His mind went in circles and his whole body seared with unbearable pain.

"Only if you worked with me. You wouldn't experience that pain." The heavy footsteps came to his direction. "Pathetic animal." He was kicked painfully on his side, breaking a rib. He screamed in agony, as his body turned to his side limply.

"St...st..stop.. Pl...please..." He tried to speak, which made him cough and swallow his own blood.

A rough hand grabbed his neck, as the person he couldn't recognize raised his hand. The poor turtle was gasping for air, as he tried to remove the much stronger hand from his neck.

The person threw him, and slammed him onto the wall. He let out another scream and his vision became totally black, but he knew, he was still awake. He just became temporarily blind.

He became nervous with the darkness he could see. The poor turtle panicked and his breathing rapidly rose. He could hear the person's steps towards him.

He tried to find anything as a weapon by tapping the ground with his hand. He closed his eyes tightly and wished for his vision to return. "You have no chance against me, Leonardo." His heart marched the time he heard the name. _Was that me? _

The unknown person stopped in front of him. He was kicked again on the same spot. He was thrown back at the wall and his head hit the concrete. After that hard hit on the head, he finally remembered who he was. His name was Leonardo, just like what the person told him. He had three younger brothers. They were raised by Master Splinter and were trained to be a ninja. Moreover, they were _turtles; mutant _turtles.They fight evil together, including Shredder, his clan and the whole colony of aliens. He finally knew his whole identity but there was one more thing he couldn't remember; why was he here?

Leo opened his eyes. His vision slowly came back and his enemy was revealed. It was Shredder, glaring at him like a murderer. The Foot Clan leader smirked, and punched him on his abdomen which knocked the air out of his lungs. He coughed more blood, and his whole body ached. He stood up and glared back at Shredder.

Blood was dripping all over him. His originally blue bandana was now heavily stained with crimson blood. He became insanely dizzy, as if the world were crumpling into him.

His blurred vision captured a figure at Shredder's back. It was slim and obviously thinner than Shredder. He couldn't recognize the figure but he knew it was smirking at him, like it was delighted to what was happening to him.

He couldn't understand, but he felt extreme hatred at that figure. It seemed like it did something to him very bad.

Leo took a step back. His heel stepped on to something. He turned his head to where it was, and he saw his katana. Instinctively, he grabbed it and held its hilt tightly.

"You still want to battle, eh, turtle?" Shredder said to him.

Leo did not reply. Instead, he charged at Shredder with his weapon and with all his strength that remained.

The much stronger enemy grabbed the poor turtle's hand and slammed him onto the floor. The turtle's eyes narrowed and the burning pain rose intensely. His whole body seemed to fall into pieces.

He lay on the ground, soaked in his blood, almost lifeless. His katana was left on his side, stained with blood. He heard that someone was speaking, but he could not understand it. He tried to raise his head. He saw that Shredder was retreating, together with the figure. They left him here, dying.

"Karai..." He muttered. He didn't know what it was. The name was somehow connected to him but he didn't know how. The moment he spoke that name, he felt anger; especially hatred.

-'":;!?,.

Leo woke up from his sleep. The same dream haunted him every time he sleeps. He opened his eyes and found himself in his room. He inspected himself, just to be sure if the wounds and injuries came back. Gladly, he was back to the real world. His head was wrapped with bandages, as well as the other parts of his body, which made him look like a mummy.

But still, there were puzzle pieces he couldn't find. Who was that "Karai" that he always speaks in his dream? Was _it _responsible that night? He just couldn't understand. He was not ready to show himself to his family; not yet. He just wanted to be alone here inside his room longer.

The longer time he tried to think who was Karai and what was its connection to him, his headaches. He was all confused, like he was losing his sanity. How could he forget about that very important thing? He also didn't know how he got there at the first place; why was he alone that time?

A tear drop fell from his heavy eyelid. It was then followed by a storm of tears, which, he couldn't stop. He started to cry violently, even though he did not know why. He hugged his knees and buried his face in his legs. He continued to cry, the thing he was doing for almost a week, every single day. It made him feel at least, a little bit better. But he didn't know how long would he cry. Would it be forever? Would he hide himself from his family? He didn't know. He just wanted to cry and cry all the rest of his life.

Suddenly, he heard a knock from the outside. He didn't bother to move, nor notice it.

"Leo? Hey are you still there?" He knew it was Raph. His younger brother always tries to get him out his room. But, no, he couldn't. He didn't like to make his brothers see him. He was their big brother; their leader. He couldn't just go outside and smile at them like none of these happened. He didn't have the dignity he once had.

"Please. Everything is not fine out here." Why everything wouldn't fine? Because of him? They could've just let him alone.

"You're the one who are saying, 'be strong!'. That everything is going to be fine! How can I do that if you...you're the one who isn't fine! I'm just here to listen! Whatever is that thing, we can fix it... Together... Please..." _No, Raph. You cannot help. Neither you, nor anyone can fix this._

He heard Raph sobbed. The red clad slammed the door strongly with his fist. Raph was disappointed to him. He just didn't know what to do. The pain was too much to bear.

_Be strong_. He always says that to his brothers, but he didn't know how to be strong. He was a total failure. He let Shredder take his honor and pride. He was defeated.

"I'm sorry.." Leo muttered under his breath. He was not strong enough for his brothers. Why did he even volunteer to be the leader, if he would only fail them?

"Why? What's wrong? Tell me..." Leo's fingers twitched, as he narrowed his eyes.

"I-I can't...I just...can't.." He replied, his voice was trembling, as he bit his lips. He raised his head and stared at the door. His eyes were red and swelling because of his cries.

"Come on, Leo. Let us fix it. Just go outside and let us talk about it." The steel door divided the two brothers. They were both crying and both didn't know what to do.

Leo breathed out and buried his face once more. "No." He said, sternly.

He heard Raph punched the wall. His room vibrated with his brother's strength. After that, he wasn't able to hear Raph knock or speak again. He finally gave up.

Leo was now left alone again. He stood up from his bed and closed his eyes. He creased his brows and gritted his teeth. Why was everything seemed to be a mess? What the heck was wrong with him? He couldn't remember some of his memories and he couldn't find out why he was feeling this anger and perplexity. He just finds himself crying for no reason like his heart had its own brain.

He felt heat rushing all over him, even though he wasn't eating for a week. "Why?!" He screamed and held the side of his bed tightly. He flipped it over using a hand and pounded it on the ground with a shocking force. A short sword flew from the bed and landed in front of him. He breathed rapidly, his eyes were narrowed.

He grabbed the blade from the floor and stared at it. His eyes narrowed once more as his head ached. The blade; the tanto blade. It was from Karai.

His memories returned like several overlapping frames inside his mind. He finally remembered everything about Karai. Starting from the first day they met until the last time he had seen her. _She...she.. _

His door was opened forcefully by Splinter's hard kick. His brothers stared at him with worries seen in their eyes. "What happened here, Leo?!" Raph asked him, without moving an inch.

Leo slowly turned to them. His eyes were flooded with tears, but his face was full of rage. His brothers and his sensei narrowed their eyes. "Karai..." He gripped the hilt of the tanto, tightly, deforming it. "...betrayed me."

-'":;!?,.

**A/N: Okay, so that's all! Phew. I had so much fun writing this! I even inserted a time to write this whilst I was on our promenade! (Yes, you heard that right.) Gah! Being Grade 9 (Yes, yes, I'm a Grade 9 student) brings so much stress! I hope you'd understand the chapter. If ever you have questions regarding the chapter, it's up to you whether you will write it as a review, or ask me, privately. I don't bite, don't you worry. Unless you're living in the same country as I am.**


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